Planning 101 30th January 2015

Opting for Two Best Men!

Lucky you, not only has someone considered you their ‘best’, but you get to share the stage with another best as well. Depending on how well you know the other best man, you may already have quite a few of the same memories and sentiment. If however, you don’t know the other person, fear not, you can both still put your heads together and come up with a fantastic wedding speech.

About a month before the wedding, get in touch with the other best man and discuss the broader details of the wedding speech. Will it be a funny speech, a sentimental one, a religious one? Will you speak one at a time, volley back and forth, or recite simultaneously (that would be interesting)? Also, do either of you have a gift of music or is one of you a better writer than the other? When the two of you speak again, decide the structure, delivery, and tone of the speech.

Set a date and time to speak again. During those two weeks, jot down all the things you think you’ll want to say, any stories you want to share, any of your favourite times or memories that you want to include in your speech. Consider the relationship of the other best man to the groom and avoid writing down any stories that may involve him so that you aren’t repeating what he comes back with.

Keep notes


Once you’ve written down everything you want to say, when the two of you speak again, share your thoughts over the two weeks and eliminate anything that is repetitive, anything the other thinks is in appropriate, and anything that is too personal. Don’t forget to include the bride in your speech and compliment her on choosing well, as she’s clearly marrying someone very dear to you. After the two of you have skimmed down your speeches, structure the speech and slot in your stories.

Begin your speech by each introducing yourselves, thank the groom for asking you to be apart of his special day, compliment the bridesmaids and the bride. After the formalities, share a story and/or a memory, making sure that each of you tells a story that is unique from the others’. Lastly, offer your well wishes, advice, and hopes for the couples’ future. Collectively raise your glasses and ask the guests and bridal party to join you in toasting the new couple.

Two best men is a rarity, capitalize on the uniqueness of the situation. You can light-heartedly banter about one of you being the obvious choice, or you remark on how honoured you feel to stand along another best friend. Regardless of what you choose, recognise that the groom did an honourable thing by not choosing between you but asking you both to speak. Highlight his character and together you will have written a memorable double best man speech.