Wedding Etiquette: Inviting your work colleagues
The age old question of what to do about inviting work colleagues to your wedding is one that troubles many engaged couples time and time again. For most of us, we spend a lot of time around our work colleagues and have grown a close relationship with a number of them, but there is often others you may not be as close to for one reason or another. So how do you strike the balance between inviting who you want to without inadvertently offending the others? A recent survey by Office Genie showed that actually the majority of people are more than happy for their work colleagues to attend their big day and in their survey of 2,000 working people, they found that 77% would have at least some of their coworkers present at the wedding and 3% even said they'd have all of them!
There was, however, still a significant 20% who wouldn't invite their colleagues, with nearly 60% citing fears that work would end up interfering with their wedding and 17% concerned over extra expense. Other reasons they came across were individual's desire to have a small wedding; not wanting to discriminate between colleagues; and fear of embarrassment from either their family and friends or the colleagues themselves.
So when it comes to your wedding, is there a particular party you agree with or are you still a little confused on the right way to do things? Well, we're with you there. The first thing you need to think about is that there are no rules, just common sense in relation to the work situation you personally have. Only you will really know what is acceptable in your work place but here are a few things to consider...
Think about the size of your office
Do you work for a large corporate or a smaller regional office, shop or start up? Have a think about the dynamics in your workplace and how closely you work alongside your colleagues. If the whole company works in real proximity to one another, it makes sense to not just exclude one or two people from proceedings but if you work solely in a team that is one of many, then perhaps consider just inviting your team and your boss. As we say, it's common sense so just assess the situation appropriately.
Remember, they don't need to come for the whole wedding
If you're worried from a budget and space point of view, then there is absolutely no harm in just inviting them to the evening do. Again, if there are some colleagues you are closer to than others, then invite them to the ceremony and reception and then make it a more open invite to the others for the evening after dinner and speeches.
Consider whether your office is formal and traditional
Traditionally in larger and more corporate companies it is generally expected that you will invite your boss or bosses, especially if you are inviting your co-workers. If you know your office is a lot more relaxed, then again assess the situation and think about how close work in relation to your boss on a day to day basis.
Ask around to see what others did
Hopefully for you, there will be people who have got married before you in the office who you can quiz on what they did. If there is a recurring theme of whether they invited everyone or just a very selective few, then consider following suit.
They'll probably need a plus one
If your work colleague is married, engaged or in a long term relationship, then it's likely they'll need to have a plus one. Again this is entirely up to you but if you are offering plus ones to the rest of your guests, it makes sense that they should have one too.
If you choose to be selective, don't shout about it
It is totally okay to choose just a few colleagues and many people do, so you shouldn't feel guilty about it. But if you're going to do so - don't make your wedding a common topic of conversation in the office, especially if there's just one or two people you're not inviting. You want to be as subtle as possible to avoid getting people's feelings hurt.